CELEBRITY CRIMINAL UPDATE

Grammy-nominated rapper Mystikal pled guilty Thursday to charges of extortion and sexual battery, having bargained out of a charge of aggravated rape, which carries a lifetime prison sentence. Mystikal, whose real name is Michael Tyler, accused his hairstylist of stealing checks and then forced her to perform oral sex on him and two acquaintances. This blog wishes that there was something that could be done to legally prevent him from boasting about his exploits as a sex offender on his next album, as he is certain to do in hopes of increasing his street cred.

In a misguided attempt to celebrate African-American identity, hip-hop culture has embraced thuggery in all its kinds: assault, burglary, the narcotics trade, rape and murder. These aspects of urban life are not to be celebrated or lionized; blacks should be ashamed that music synonomous with their culture has spawned an inordinate amount of violent criminals. Rapists are nothing more than cowards; detestable, sniveling worms with no rightful claim to masculinity. You're not powerful. You're weak and nefarious. "Mystikal" should see a tremendous sales backlash; if the court won't hold him accountable, at least consumers still can.